noahkempton
Colony Member
Hi all!
I am attempting to send out my first agent query letter, but before I do that, I would like some help making sure that it is the best it can be. I'm not sure exactly what criticism I'm looking for, so anything constructive you have to offer would be helpful.
Dear Ethan Ellenberg,
I am writing to you seeking representation for Origins: The Compound, a 113,000 word YA adventure fantasy novel, the first completed work in the Origins Saga, with the sequel, The Kingdom of Thalvia, entering its second draft.
Origins: The Compound follows an orphan boy, Viper, as he grapples with his identity while embarking on a daring rescue mission to save his adoptive brother from a malicious cult of cannibals, unaware of larger forces lurking in and pulling the strings from the shadows.
Alongside the formidable Dale and the mysterious Harlow, Viper fights against time and the land’s perils to save Junn, collecting allies along the way. They had no idea that the salvation of family would reveal a larger plot to end life in Hyravon as they know it. Armed with secrets of the past and enigmatic weaponry, it is up to Viper to unite against the darkness, lest the darkness consume them all.
Fans of Eragon and The Lord of the Rings will one interested in reading Viper’s story. I have received a positive 4 out of 5-star Clarion review by prolific book reviewer John M. Murray of Foreword Reviews, known for his insightful, genre-blending reviews of fiction, on a completed draft of the book. I also have a self-published horror anthology and a sequel to Origins: The Compound in its first draft available upon request.
Though not a sci-fi title, Origins: The Compound will fit in well with other titles you have represented, such as The Solar Queen by Andre Norton for its adventurous, ensemble cast of characters, and the works of John Scalzi for his focus on character as they contend with existential conflicts, such as identity and mortality. Full of vivid detail, strong characters, and injected with sarcasm and humor, Origins: The Compound will feel at home with your representation.
Yours sincerely,
Noah Kempton
I am attempting to send out my first agent query letter, but before I do that, I would like some help making sure that it is the best it can be. I'm not sure exactly what criticism I'm looking for, so anything constructive you have to offer would be helpful.
Dear Ethan Ellenberg,
I am writing to you seeking representation for Origins: The Compound, a 113,000 word YA adventure fantasy novel, the first completed work in the Origins Saga, with the sequel, The Kingdom of Thalvia, entering its second draft.
Origins: The Compound follows an orphan boy, Viper, as he grapples with his identity while embarking on a daring rescue mission to save his adoptive brother from a malicious cult of cannibals, unaware of larger forces lurking in and pulling the strings from the shadows.
Alongside the formidable Dale and the mysterious Harlow, Viper fights against time and the land’s perils to save Junn, collecting allies along the way. They had no idea that the salvation of family would reveal a larger plot to end life in Hyravon as they know it. Armed with secrets of the past and enigmatic weaponry, it is up to Viper to unite against the darkness, lest the darkness consume them all.
Fans of Eragon and The Lord of the Rings will one interested in reading Viper’s story. I have received a positive 4 out of 5-star Clarion review by prolific book reviewer John M. Murray of Foreword Reviews, known for his insightful, genre-blending reviews of fiction, on a completed draft of the book. I also have a self-published horror anthology and a sequel to Origins: The Compound in its first draft available upon request.
Though not a sci-fi title, Origins: The Compound will fit in well with other titles you have represented, such as The Solar Queen by Andre Norton for its adventurous, ensemble cast of characters, and the works of John Scalzi for his focus on character as they contend with existential conflicts, such as identity and mortality. Full of vivid detail, strong characters, and injected with sarcasm and humor, Origins: The Compound will feel at home with your representation.
Yours sincerely,
Noah Kempton
