Help Please! bloody cover letters.

[Dorm Ant]

Not every story has comp titles. Mine certainly doesn't. Two of the eight agents I submitted to in my first round asked for a full, so simply leaving that bit off is not the deal breaker that some websites and unpublished writers claim it is.

 

[RK Wallis]

Not every story has comp titles. Mine certainly doesn't. Two of the eight agents I submitted to in my first round asked for a full, so simply leaving that bit off is not the deal breaker that some websites and unpublished writers claim it is.

Totally agree.

 

[Barbara]

I rarely mention comp titles. Mainly because I can't find any.

All that matters is our book. The agent will either be able to sell it to a publisher, or they won't. That's how they look at our subs. Even our bios don't really matter. It's simply a product thing. The rest helps but won't swing it.

 

[LJ Beck]

It's really interesting and super helpful hearing what's worked for you guys. Most agents seem so adamant about what should be in a sub, it's almost frightening. But if they request a full, the proof is in the pud, right? Makes sense that writers will (and should) have their own take on how they submit. I never thought about that before, but I will now. Ha. cool!

 

[E G Logan]

the word isn’t personal but tailored to the publisher/agency from the perspective of the books they have published or represented.

Yes, I agree. Exactly that. Much more precise.
I use 'personal' as my own kind of shorthand, I suppose – I should have seen it wasn't that very clear to anyone else.

 

[E G Logan]

But if they request a full, the proof is in the pud, right? Makes sense that writers will (and should) have their own take on how they submit. I never thought about that before, but I will now. Ha. cool!

The frightening thing is hearing quite high-profile agents, ones I would have liked to send my sample* to, say at conferences and other events (in public, on the record): "If I don't like the letter, I don't waste my time on the text."

They're never going to request your full ms if your letter doesn't do it for them. (And what does THAT take?? If I knew that, I'd write a How-To book about it...)

But the point is, I strongly believe – and experience supports my thinking – that it is worth putting in the effort on the letter. OK, agents' bios are often vague and general, but try their social media, their speeches at events... Shake the trees. Look at The Bookseller and Publishers Lunch (the US daily) – if you can say you saw their name in either of those, they'll know you're serious...

*but didn't.

 

[Rachael Burnett]

Yes, I agree. Exactly that. Much more precise.
I use 'personal' as my own kind of shorthand, I suppose – I should have seen it wasn't that very clear to anyone else.

Honestly, it’s the same thing really and great advice from you

 

[Hannah Faoileán]

Just read a piece of advice from an agent:

Imagine the agent/publisher is exhausted. It's 11pm, the baby's crying, the red wine is drunk, he/she/they have already read 50 subs and, eyes half closed, are hankering for bed.
They take a look at your query letter. WAKE THEM UP!

 

[E G Logan]

Just read a piece of advice from an agent:

Imagine the agent/publisher is exhausted. It's 11pm, the baby's crying, the red wine is drunk, he/she/they have already read 50 subs and, eyes half closed, are hankering for bed.
They take a look at your query letter. WAKE THEM UP!

I get that. I really do.
But what it takes to do that is the thing... And what intrigues one agent – reaches out and grabs them – may make another think 'this person is too far along the line from 'interestingly different' in the direction of 'barking bonkers'.

 

[LA Thomas]

Sorry I’m late to this. You have a lot to be getting on with it I would love to help with your next draft.

Happy to send you my own via dm if that’s any help, although I’m no expert however I’ve had a lot of help with mine.

Take a look at other peoples to see what is expected of you.

I suggest you look at query shark.

Query Shark

How To Write Query Letters ... or, really, how to revise query letters so they actually work

queryshark.blogspot.com

There is a group on Facebook called ‘queries, synopsis etc.’ which is useful for reading other authors queries and seeing the comments.

There is another key one I used but my mind has gone blank. If I remember fit I’ll pop back and add it to this thread.

Good luck-you’ve got this!

 

[Jake E]

Sorry I’m late to this. You have a lot to be getting on with it I would love to help with your next draft.

Happy to send you my own via dm if that’s any help, although I’m no expert however I’ve had a lot of help with mine.

Take a look at other peoples to see what is expected of you.

I suggest you look at query shark.

Query Shark

How To Write Query Letters ... or, really, how to revise query letters so they actually work

queryshark.blogspot.com

There is a group on Facebook called ‘queries, synopsis etc.’ which is useful for reading other authors queries and seeing the comments.

There is another key one I used but my mind has gone blank. If I remember fit I’ll pop back and add it to this thread.

Good luck-you’ve got this!

Some great resources, thank you.

I'd heard of query shark some years ago and had forgotten about her, thanks for the reminder; she had good advice if i recall.

I'd love to see any examples of query letter/cover letters.

 

[E G Logan]

I'd love to see any examples of query letter/cover letters.

One UK sample submission letter I liked a lot came from top agent Juliet Mushens. It's on her website. If you can't find it, shout – I have it somewhere. However, UK agents disagree hugely on how to do this letter.

In my experience (painful, lengthy), US agents agree more on what should be included in a query. Because it's short, here is one from prominent agent Victoria Saunders. She wants a 'jump straight into the story' approach – and she isn't worried about comps.


US query letter
[normally, put 'Query' and the title of the book on the subject line of your e-mail.]

Victoria Sanders
HOW TO WRITE A QUERY LETTER (punchy)

The best query letters are well written sales tools.

– Start with a terrific opening sentence that encapsulates the crux of the story. Remember that you’re selling here, so make it one sentence that if I repeated to you on the street, you would rush out and buy the book.

– Then segue into a one or two paragraph, concise, fascinating, unputdownable description, with a sprinkling of terrific plot points to pull me in.

– Lastly, give me a short but thorough paragraph on you and your accomplishments, preferably in the publishing arena, but if not, then neat titbits about you that make you more interesting than most.

 

[Dorm Ant]

– Start with a terrific opening sentence that encapsulates the crux of the story. Remember that you’re selling here, so make it one sentence that if I repeated to you on the street, you would rush out and buy the book.

– Then segue into a one or two paragraph, concise, fascinating, unputdownable description, with a sprinkling of terrific plot points to pull me in.

– Lastly, give me a short but thorough paragraph on you and your accomplishments, preferably in the publishing arena, but if not, then neat titbits about you that make you more interesting than most.

I did this, though my opening line was about why I was writing to them, and the word count and genre of story.

 

[E G Logan]

I did this, though my opening line was about why I was writing to them, and the word count and genre of story.

Yes, UK agents mostly – but not all – do want that, first. Victoria Sanders is a US agent.

 

[LA Thomas]

I completely forgot The Shit No one Tells You About Writing podcast!



They critique queries almost every week.

 

[LA Thomas]

Oh and these

 

[LA Thomas]

 

[LA Thomas]

 

[LA Thomas]

 

[LA Thomas]

 

[LA Thomas]

 

[LA Thomas]

Some great resources, thank you.

I'd heard of query shark some years ago and had forgotten about her, thanks for the reminder; she had good advice if i recall.

I'd love to see any examples of query letter/cover letters.

Dm me Jake and I’ll send you mine.

 

[SarahC]

I think comps is where I'm going to fall down.
I have no idea what other books mine is like... Not recent ones anyway.
I don't tend to read modern titles and my work is nothing like the stuff i normally read. GOT, the Witcher series, mistborn etc..

I read a couple of books recently that reminded me of your stuff - CK McDonnell - The Stranger Times (about a supernatural newspaper) and Rivers of London by Ben Aaronovitch. Both quite Pratchett-y in terms of writing, but relatively recently published. Maybe not quite the full fantasy of your work as are set in the real world with a fantasy twist, but could be a place to start Googling. (And you also might enjoy them - I laughed out loud several times reading Rivers of London, especially in the opening pages.)

 

[Jake E]

I read a couple of books recently that reminded me of your stuff - CK McDonnell - The Stranger Times (about a supernatural newspaper) and Rivers of London by Ben Aaronovitch. Both quite Pratchett-y in terms of writing, but relatively recently published. Maybe not quite the full fantasy of your work as are set in the real world with a fantasy twist, but could be a place to start Googling. (And you also might enjoy them - I laughed out loud several times reading Rivers of London, especially in the opening pages.)

I'll look them up, thanks

 

[Dorm Ant]

I don't think Rivers of London is anything like your style. Can't comment on the other.

 

[Jake E]

How's this?

Dear ________,

I am seeking representation for my novel The Trouble with Prophecies. A fantasy story of 85,000 words. I saw on your website that you are looking for stories with strong characters and books about books. My book is a humorous meta commentary on the chosen one trope.

Some readers say my novel is Monty Python meets Terry Pratchett, and no, it wasn’t my mother.
She said she didn’t like it.
It is the story of Derrick, the last wizard, and his quest to avoid any and all responsibility for the saving of the world.

I currently work as a teaching assistant in a Special Educational Needs school and write in my free time. I have written many books over the years but have only recently found my voice with this latest work.

Thank you for your time.
I look forward to hearing from you,

Jake Joy.

 

[Vagabond Heart]

Hi Jake.
Here's my thoughts. Hope they help. xxx

 

[LA Thomas]

There are a few redundant words. I tweaked the opening just as a starter:

I am seeking representation for my 85,000 word fantasy, The Trouble with Prophecies. I understand you seek stories with strong characters and books about books.

Here you need to explain how your book fits what the agent is looking for. Eg you say they are seeking strong characters, who are the strong characters in yours? How is yours a book about books?

My book is a humorous meta commentary on the chosen one trope.

It is recommended you do not say your book is humorous. Leave that decision for the agent to decide. You do not need to tell it’s a chosen one trope as I presume you will show that with your blurb?

“Some readers say”

Agents don’t tend to want to know what your reads think (sorry!)

my novel is Monty Python meets Terry Pratchett, and no, it wasn’t my mother.
She [said she] didn’t like it.

At least one comp needs to be a book within the last five years.

“It is the story of” this is redundant.

Derrick, the last wizard, and his quest to avoid any and all responsibility for the saving of the world.

This is far too short for a blurb. This is the key to selling your book. You need to expand on this. I did add lots of links to show you over 60 examples of other authors queries to give you an idea.

I currently work as a teaching assistant in a Special Educational Needs school [and write in my free time. I have written many books over the years but have only recently found my voice with this latest work.] I don’t think you need this last part but this bio could do with some tlc. I struggled with mine as I don’t have any writing qualifications. I recommend you listen to TSNOTYAW podcast I recommended plus the Pop Up bios for examples.

Thank you for your time.

I look forward to hearing from you (I don’t think you need this last line, especially as some agents may not reply if it’s a no. )

I hope some of this helps.

 

[RK Wallis]

How's this?

Dear ________,

I am seeking representation for my novel The Trouble with Prophecies. A fantasy story of 85,000 words. I saw on your website that you are looking for stories with strong characters and books about books. My book is a humorous meta commentary on the chosen one trope.

Some readers say my novel is Monty Python meets Terry Pratchett, and no, it wasn’t my mother.
She said she didn’t like it.
It is the story of Derrick, the last wizard, and his quest to avoid any and all responsibility for the saving of the world.

I currently work as a teaching assistant in a Special Educational Needs school and write in my free time. I have written many books over the years but have only recently found my voice with this latest work.

Thank you for your time.
I look forward to hearing from you,

Jake Joy.

Honestly, Jake, this almost does the job for me. Sometimes I feel we can write these so much, we write out our voice. Before I joined a writing forum and workshopped the query, an agent picked one of my earlier books up in a week. Back then, I knew nothing. So, Pete's right, no agent is going to turn down a book if they think they can sell it. Of course, now I know better, I wouldn't dream of not workshopping my current query.

I'd consider altering your bio line. By the way, my cousin is a teaching assistant for special needs kids (for 20 years). Hard job, physically and mentally, but rewarding too. I've heard some heartbreaking stories. Back to your bio, I'd drop "write in my free time...this latest work." Every writer writes in their free time. Equally, I wouldn't tell an agent you've found your voice; let them decide for themselves. Don't waste words on something that won't make you stand out or sound like an individual. Think of something you've done in your life that says, "hey, this is my personality", or something about yourself. As an example, this is mine:

I’m a wife and mother with three teenage sloths and one fat whippet, living down under in a land of floods, drought and beaches. In 2013, I suffered a catastrophic stroke, lost my mobility, voice, job, and full use of my hands, but writing and books sustain me. This novel was written with three left-hand fingers, and they’ll keep typing while the stories flow.

I worked on this and huddled it many times from May 2021 through to November 2021 and I've made some tweaks since. I know it's slightly wordy, but if an agent has a problem with that, that's not an agent I want to work with. I've reached a point where I don't care what they think. They'll like it or they won't.

 

[Dorm Ant]

How's this?

Dear ________,

I seek representation for my novel The Trouble with Prophecies. A fantasy story of 85,000 words. I saw on your website that you are looking for stories with strong characters and books about books. My book is a humorous meta commentary on the chosen one trope.

Some readers say my novel is Monty Python meets Terry Pratchett, and no, it wasn’t my mother.
She said she didn’t like it.
It is the story of Derrick, the last wizard, and his quest to avoid any and all responsibility for the saving of the world.

I currently work as a teaching assistant in a Special Educational Needs school.

Thank you for your time.
I look forward to hearing from you,

Jake Joy.

Have trimmed a few of your filler bits. A great letter, once pruned a little.