Resilience & the Writer

Imposter syndrome?

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Paul Whybrow

Full Member
Jun 20, 2015
Cornwall, UK
As I near the end of writing my fifth Cornish Detective novel, I had a rather sardonic thought that I'm about where I thought I'd be five years after returning to creative writing in 2013. What prompted this bit of reflection was literally a reflection, for the screen of my laptop monetarily darkened, turning it into a mirror, so I had one of those 'Aargh' moments when you catch sight of your ageing self going about your business! Here was I, researching an obscure fact about forensic medicine, for a crime novel that has so far taken me nine months to gestate—that may never be read by any fan of the genre.

It made me wonder how determined or maybe delusional an unknown author, in particular, has to be to keep their nose to the grindstone. Doing writing because you love it is great motivation: anyone who chooses becoming an author as the road to riches (in a J. K. Rowling way), is going to find it's a rocky track with deep ditches waiting to swallow them up on either side.

All of this musing reminded me of something that noted writing guru Noah Lukeman has said several times in his books—that realistically, a new author should plan on it taking three to four years to get anywhere with their stories—to adopt a mindset that it's going to be long haul. In answer to a question from a newbie author on how to query a literary agent when you have no proof of your writing ability, Lukeman says:

You can attain major credentials on your own, but first you must prepare for a sustained effort. Instead of a three or six month plan to attain all the credentials you need, why not give yourself a three or six year plan? With that kind of time, you can attend writing programs, workshops, conferences, colonies; spend extensive time networking and build an endorsement list; get stories published in magazines and online; begin to build a platform; and most importantly, hone your craft extensively. This doesn’t mean you need to refrain from approaching agents before you accomplish all of this; on the contrary, as I said, there is nothing wrong with approaching agents with no credentials whatsoever, and you can work to achieve all of this concurrently with your approaching the industry. But you should always be working to this end, regardless. There are many specific, concrete steps you can take to help get you there (which I explain at length in my book How to Land (and Keep) a Literary Agent), but perhaps the most important step of all is your willingness to devote a sustained, multi-year effort to building your bio on your own.

From Ask A Literary Agent (Year One)...a free pdf download at:

http://www.lukeman.com/ASK A LITERARY AGENT YEAR ONE.pdf

Despite this salutary advice, I still harboured the hope that I could earn a few quid from self-publishing my early writing as eBooks on Smashwords and Amazon. I was right—I made a small amount—about $40!

After foolishly querying about 350 agents with my first Cornish Detective novel, that was an unfeasibly long 179,000 words, I edited it down and also wrote a new opening story at the acceptable length of 80,000 words. I queried another 100 literary agents and publishers with open submission windows, getting more favourable responses and learning how to target specific agents, stalking them on social media to find their likes and dislikes. One large agency, that handles writers, musicians, television programme makers and actors, asked me if my first novel was part of a series—as it would be easier to pitch to a publisher or television production company.

That had always been my intention anyway, to write a series of crime novels, with a view to them being adapted into a television drama, along the lines of Inspector Wycliffewhich is also set in Cornwall, though it pre-dates the computer age, making it rather creaky.

This sounds ambitious of me, but why not aim for the stars? I posted this quote from Michelangelo in another thread recently, but it's worth repeating:

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short, but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.

Accordingly, I've now built a solid body of work, but in all honesty, how can I know whether it will appeal to anyone? Writing is full of uncertainty: no one knows what will work until it does!

Pride is an emotion I don't exactly trust, as I'm more stoical in my approach to life, but I am proud of my Cornish Detective stories—and also of my bloody-minded determination to get them written—sacrificing most of what normal people consider essential, such as a social life and a love life. It's helpful that I'm a reclusive old geezer! :)

The writing has been joyful to me, but what I'm not looking forward to is returning to the self-promotion trail. Navigating the world of publishing is like stumbling through thick fog with only a candle for illumination, banging the instruments of my one-man-band hoping to attract attention. That's the feeling I get whether I'm chasing a traditional publishing contract or if I return to self-publishing. No one else much cares what I've created—a hard fact of life every author should quickly realise—so it's up to me to big myself up.

I've sometimes thought, that the best preparation for becoming a writer is to get everyone that you know to say "No" to you, when you ask them something, as it's a word you'll be hearing a lot when it comes to trying to sell your book. At least 500 times would be good preparation for growing a hide as thick as a rhinoceros!

How long have you been writing?

How thick is your hide?

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

computers-pc-write-manuscript-criticism-critics-forn626_low.jpg
 
How long have you been writing?

How thick is your hide?

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

Been writing all my life. It's been 17 years since I started my first novel.

My hide is rubber, I let things bounce off it.

Rejection started on the dance floor as a pre-teen. It hovers waiting to strike at any opportunity. Writing rejections have been two, and those were nice lengthy responses of encouragement.

My friends and family don't mind. My activities are wide spread and I drag them along as much as I can. In writing, they read and comment.

Smiles
Bob
 
How long have you been writing?
Since I was 7 or 8. But I didn't get serious about it until 2000 (the year I turned 43), and I wasn't published until 2011.

How thick is your hide?
Not thick at all. I ride an emotional roller coaster most of the time, and I have almost no self-confidence. But I've always been that way.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?
No. It's the other way around. LOL! Early rejection in my life has helped me deal with it in my writing.

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!
My friends and family think I'm amazing for putting as much time into my writing and my writing career as I do, while still working outside the home and doing a million other things. :)
 
I got my first rejection in 1978 when I was 8 years old--a poem I'd submitted somewhere--so I'm an old hand at literary rejection. Some rejections hurt more than others--most bounce off, but sometimes I'll think 'yeah, this is the perfect agent/publisher/magazine for this story,' and when they say no, it stings. But there's always another place to submit, there's always another potential round of revisions, there's always another story ... Keep Calm and Eat Cake, as they say.
 
How long have you been writing?

Always.

How thick is your hide?

Depends.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?

No and I don't feel guilty about murdering my wife either.

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

I don't have any friends who aren't writers. My family thinks I'm mad whether I write or not.
 
How long have you been writing?

Not long.

How thick is your hide?

Leathery. Rubbery. But it has the odd hole where stuff can get it. I'm used to rejection. I grew up that way, and it taught me that I don't need anyone else's approval to feel whole. We can't please everyone. It's life. Sometimes it's personal, sometimes it isn't; either way I try to see what I can learn from it, and if I can find some humour among it then 'oh, goody'. When I submit, I put myself in the agent's shoes, and imagine what it's like to get tons of submissions. Loads of people are witing loads of books. It follows that most will have to be rejected. It's partly a number's game, but it also depends on the moods of eveyone in the chain. The thing is to know when to listen to what you're being 'told' either directly by the refuser, or via the fact it's a rejection. After 10 rejections, I think: 'Maybe it's them, not me, but either way, let's see if they have a point'. After 30, I start to think: 'Aha, someink is def up'. I once had 70 rejections. I thought: 'OK, I ought to take the hint. Drop it now, or re-write'.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?

No the other way round. Life taught me to deal with rejection in writing.

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

Def the second, but nowadays, they just shrug.
 
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How long have you been writing?

To long.

How thick is your hide?

Varies from day to day. I like to think of myself as being coated in the thickest covering possible, but catch me on the wrong day and I can wilt with the best of them.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?

Only ever submitted articles to a football fanzine and they would print anything, especially since the editor was a mate!

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

They think it a little odd although they are always supportive but also assume that because you have written a novel, it will automatically become a best seller.
 
How long have you been writing?

Writing with a view to getting stuff read? About 20 years. Since 1997.

How thick is your hide?

Ultra thin at times, I can physically feel things sometimes that are coming at me or towards me from someone else, whether they mean to send it or not. Not always nice. Reasonably thick otherwise. I bounce back quickly. I'm OK. You're OK. We're good.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life? Rejection is part of life. I may feel a need to re calibrate, sit and groom my fur a few moments.. ...metaphorically speaking :) Maybe weep a little if it's a particularly bad day, pain wise. Then I move on. I always have some goal in view and it helps me keep my balance.

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!

They respect the fact of my sustained efforts. They don't think I'm mad. My spouse doesn't read fiction, and fears I may be on a hiding to nothing, but he's proud and delighted when anything gets into print. I have a loyal champion in my brother....says my psychic policeman is way more interesting than Rivers of London (he's a policeman and he reads a lot....loves Tom Clancy) I fretted that it might not commercial enough for the current market. He said, 'Not commercial enough? My arse!'
So I'm lucky.
 
A great insight into your minds. I've enjoyed reading this thread. :)

How long have you been writing?
Six years.

How thick is your hide?
Neither thick nor thin. I'm certainly sensitive to criticism -- it would be hard for me to improve if I weren't -- but I'd like to think I carry it with some sense of grace. I hope.

Does being an oft-refused author help you cope with rejection is other parts of your life?
I'm not so oft refused in the sense that I haven't been writing long enough; 23 rejections and counting, though that was more than enough to make me ditch the first novel and turn to something new. So the answer to this question is no.

Do friends and family admire your determination—or think you're just a bit mad?!
A bit of both. It depends which way the wind is blowing.
 
I'm certainly sensitive to criticism
That's an intersting one. When does rejection end and critisism begin (or maybe it's the other way round, the critisism end and the rejection begin)? Is critisism is a form of rejection? Or could there even be an entire world between them?

It's Friday and I should stop thinking. ;)

But I agree with you @Rich. , a healthy dose of critisism, is always good.
 
You do show grace @Rich. I've noticed it more than once.
*blush*

Is critisism is a form of rejection?
When it's negative, I guess so. But more generally, I think rejection is a form of criticism. In the case of rejections from agents or publishers, it's not always obvious what the criticism is -- it could be anything, from genuine dislike to poor timing.
 
*blush*


When it's negative, I guess so. But more generally, I think rejection is a form of criticism. In the case of rejections from agents or publishers, it's not always obvious what the criticism is -- it could be anything, from genuine dislike to poor timing.
That's the difficult bit, isn't it. We end up second guessing the rejection, or analysing it for England, and then paranoia takes over. Or at least mine does. I don't mind rejection at all, nor do I mind someone telling me my work is rubbish (I half hope they do because it might open an insight cos I want to learn) but I hate not knowing why. It means I don't know what to fix or how to fix it. Of course if it's a matter of dislike, or poor timing, nothing can be fixed.
 
That's the difficult bit, isn't it. We end up second guessing the rejection, or analysing it for England, and then paranoia takes over. Or at least mine does. I don't mind rejection at all, nor do I mind someone telling me my work is rubbish (I half hope they do because it might open an insight cos I want to learn) but I hate not knowing why. It means I don't know what to fix or how to fix it. Of course if it's a matter of dislike, or poor timing, nothing can be fixed.
Yes, I agree--I hate not knowing why something's been rejected. I always jump on those submissions opportunities that offer feedback, even if it's only a sentence along the lines of 'We liked X, but Y.' Sadly, those are few and far between. 'Thanks, but I'll pass on this' just doesn't provide any help.
 
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