- Aug 6, 2014
- 1,220
- 2,454
...turns out, it's with nausea.
Yeah, I don't get me either.
Twenty years, I've been failing. I've collected pissoffwriter.docs from every agent and editor on the face of the planet, so I simply resolved to get a second copy from each of them. I've been snubbed by so many places that I'm certain some of them sprang into existence Twilight Zone-style ("What do you mean, the publishing house down the street rejected you yesterday? That building's been empty and condemned for years!") just so the universe can keep its combo bonus going with my frustration.
Just now, I found this reply in my email from an agent I forgot I even submitted to:
"Hi Lex,
I very much enjoyed your submission and would like to read the entire first book. Feel free to send it along to this email address at your convenience."
...what?!
This is some kind of mistake, right? Or a cruel joke? Perhaps this person was just drunk when they sent out what looks to me to be a "form acceptance", right? As I said, I sent this so long ago that I actually forgot about it, so I'm thinking this has to be some kind of mix-up.
Even so, out of all the feelings I imagined if I ever got anything OTHER than pissoffwriter.doc, I didn't expect to be literally sick to my stomach. I read that line, something I would have thought would fill me with elation, and all I want is to throw up. I know that realistically this isn't going to lead to anything (even if this weren't some kind of odd mix-up, reviewing this person's genres has me wondering why the hell I ever submitted to them, and why they would be interested enough to read the submission in the first place) so I don't have any emotional attachment to this. I guess I'm just in something like shock?
Anyway, weirdness. How are all of you?
Yeah, I don't get me either.
Twenty years, I've been failing. I've collected pissoffwriter.docs from every agent and editor on the face of the planet, so I simply resolved to get a second copy from each of them. I've been snubbed by so many places that I'm certain some of them sprang into existence Twilight Zone-style ("What do you mean, the publishing house down the street rejected you yesterday? That building's been empty and condemned for years!") just so the universe can keep its combo bonus going with my frustration.
Just now, I found this reply in my email from an agent I forgot I even submitted to:
"Hi Lex,
I very much enjoyed your submission and would like to read the entire first book. Feel free to send it along to this email address at your convenience."
...what?!
This is some kind of mistake, right? Or a cruel joke? Perhaps this person was just drunk when they sent out what looks to me to be a "form acceptance", right? As I said, I sent this so long ago that I actually forgot about it, so I'm thinking this has to be some kind of mix-up.
Even so, out of all the feelings I imagined if I ever got anything OTHER than pissoffwriter.doc, I didn't expect to be literally sick to my stomach. I read that line, something I would have thought would fill me with elation, and all I want is to throw up. I know that realistically this isn't going to lead to anything (even if this weren't some kind of odd mix-up, reviewing this person's genres has me wondering why the hell I ever submitted to them, and why they would be interested enough to read the submission in the first place) so I don't have any emotional attachment to this. I guess I'm just in something like shock?
Anyway, weirdness. How are all of you?
