Returned from China to Wreak Havoc

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Mark Odell

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Or 'Hello', if you prefer.

I've been teaching China for the last year in case you were curious as to exactly what the Hades my subject line was about. So I'm back after a writer's retreat of sorts, in which I was teaching but also trying to write. I am that most common of entities, the writer who has written but has little to impress those we whisper of in darkened corners but who are known only as those who refuse 'unsolicited submissions'. I have done some writing work for a videogame called 'Stasis' but other than that have little to my name other than some hard work and a couple of finished manuscripts. I hope by being on this website, I can change that in some way. I want to learn from my peers and hopefully contribute something myself. Believe me, I'm prepared to put the work in. I tend to write either horror or comedy, depending on how I feel.

Incidentally, if you don't believe I've been in China, well....

terracotta_zpsmu6ojamy.png


I am also a master of timing. So yeah, I just wanted to say 'Hi', and I hope I can do good things here.

Look forward to spending more time in The Colony!

Mark
 
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A good question!

I've swotted up on about 5000 years of history so I've learned a lot about the psyche of a nation so I know a lot about the history of China now. Also I know they're terrified of ghosts; their horror tends to be quite violent but rarely is it scary, but put in a haunting and a lot of people grow very uncomfortable. They have a unique relationship with the dead so it feels more close to home than, say, movies about axe murderers. Also people are generous but they have dozens of social rules for the dinner table, and that you could stay there your entire life but you would only ever be 'the foreigner' - although they will welcome you with open arms if you at least try to speak some Chinese.

Also that crossing roads in China is not good for anxiety sufferers. And rural bus routes are hellish Dante-esque journeys into pain and misery on a horse made of steel.
 
[QUOTE And rural bus routes are hellish Dante-esque journeys into pain and misery on a horse made of steel.[/QUOTE]

Heeee....
Is it the idea of the return of the dead they most fear, or the wrath of the dead?....
 
They seem to be afraid of the return of the dead, and terrified of their wrath. I was told several times by Chinese people that they had encountered or felt the presence of the spirits of their deceased relatives. But the existence of rituals to essentially appease the spirits of their ancestors exist as high up as the Emperor - so they took the whole vengeful spirit aspect of things very seriously indeed. I tried to photograph a series of remarkable looking gravestones on a hillside. The Chinese girl with us pleaded with me not to do so because of any possible 'consequences'.
 
Hi Mark, nice to meet you.
I'm fascinated by the relationship between China and its ghosts. As you'll know, in Chinese culture, ghosts are just part of life - something that happens, like dogs and cats. Not all of them are evil, in fact most of them - as I understand it - will leave you alone if you do the same to them.
When I was a kid I used to hate going near bins and trash cans because that was where the wasps were. I think if I'd grown up in China I would have avoided going near water on account of all the spooks.

Anyway. Nice to meet you. We're all massive experts in the art of literature and highly successful authors in our fields. Our six figure deals mean we all have lots of time to spend on forums, which is nice.
 
Yeah they're quite sanguine about the presence of ghosts, talking about them isn't really a problem. Pissing them off on the other hand is something they dread. I'm only basing this on the conversations I had so I don't know academically if I'm correct, but that seems to be the general approach. They took it very seriously which implied a certain level of fear, but yes the ritual of having a dinner with the ancestor does imply a certain 'Hey, let's hang out and stuff' approach to family ghosts. I used to think they'd just wait for me in my bedroom. For some reason, a recurring nightmare of mine was being followed home by the dead from Choir practice when I was eleven.

Nice to meet you too! If you have any diamond encrusted keyboard covers then let me know if you have one for sale in the area of six or seven figures.
 
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Welcome, I look forward to reading some of your work. Especially if it has that Oriental theme to it. I'm so jealous of your pic, I'd love to see the Terracotta Warriors, I bet the atmosphere is amazing.
 
They are incredible, I loved them. Photos do not do them justice; there's just a certain beautiful dignity as they stand there in their ranks. Unforgettable experience. I won't claim to suddenly be the resident expert on all things Oriental, but I am using my experience for my next writing project so that Oriental theme will make its way to the surface :)
 
Or 'Hello', if you prefer.

I've been teaching China for the last year in case you were curious as to exactly what the Hades my subject line was about. So I'm back after a writer's retreat of sorts, in which I was teaching but also trying to write. I am that most common of entities, the writer who has written but has little to impress those we whisper of in darkened corners but who are known only as those who refuse 'unsolicited submissions'. I have done some writing work for a videogame called 'Stasis' but other than that have little to my name other than some hard work and a couple of finished manuscripts. I hope by being on this website, I can change that in some way. I want to learn from my peers and hopefully contribute something myself. Believe me, I'm prepared to put the work in. I tend to write either horror or comedy, depending on how I feel.

Incidentally, if you don't believe I've been in China, well....

terracotta_zpsmu6ojamy.png


I am also a master of timing. So yeah, I just wanted to say 'Hi', and I hope I can do good things here.

Look forward to spending more time in The Colony!

Mark
Yeah, you'll fit in perfectly here! Welcome, Mark. Pull up a chair. Or waste ten minutes looking for chair-related memes, to find them wanting. For example:
images.jpg Funniest_Memes_nothing-really-mattress-couldn-t-chair-less_7035.jpeg
6f4.jpg
 
Ha! That last one was the same we used when Tropical storm Bill passed over us in Texas.
Bill made it here to Maryland Saturday — it was still a hell of a thunderstorm. We even got a tornado warning out of it, though really nothing in the way of damage.
 
Bill made it here to Maryland Saturday — it was still a hell of a thunderstorm. We even got a tornado warning out of it, though really nothing in the way of damage.

We got tornado warnings as well, but you should have seen the lines at the grocery store the day before it came in. People were acting like they were expecting a Cat 3 or something, so the little storms we got were disappointing.
 
Hey, Mark, good to have you here. My youngest is just off to Beijing Uni for an entire year, as part of his Mandarin course at SOAS. Any survival tips gratefully received by (probably over-)anxious parents... :)

Hey, no problem! He will have a great time, Beijing is one of the most amazing places to go. Very safe and easy to get around. But make sure he has his mask with him at all times - you can get them from pharmacies - and to check the PM2 levels before he goes to classes in the morning. Also make sure the taxi cabbies have the meter on, and NEVER accept the first price given to you by a market trader. Finally, tell him to check out Hua's Courtyard Restaurant in Dongzhimen Nei Daije (Dongcheng) for some relatively inexpensive and amazingly tasty Peking duck. Hope this helps :)
 
Hey, no problem! He will have a great time, Beijing is one of the most amazing places to go. Very safe and easy to get around. But make sure he has his mask with him at all times - you can get them from pharmacies - and to check the PM2 levels before he goes to classes in the morning. Also make sure the taxi cabbies have the meter on, and NEVER accept the first price given to you by a market trader. Finally, tell him to check out Hua's Courtyard Restaurant in Dongzhimen Nei Daije (Dongcheng) for some relatively inexpensive and amazingly tasty Peking duck. Hope this helps :)
The man knows his stuff.
 
We got tornado warnings as well, but you should have seen the lines at the grocery store the day before it came in. People were acting like they were expecting a Cat 3 or something, so the little storms we got were disappointing.

Tornados? Holy -INSERT NON DENOMINATIONAL DEITY HERE-!

Seriously, I'm from a country where a bit of thunder is a reason to panic for some people. I couldn't even comprehend a tornado.
 
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