On the Destruction of your Manuscript...

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Whoa, that was awesome. It made me realise that I used to deal with writing the same way I would deal with every other problem: hide from it and hope it goes away. I think this is one reason it took me so long to finally sit down and finish something. I couldn't take the doubt I always felt in what I was doing. And heck, at one point I was writing about a sock so it's hardly as if I was worried that my genius wouldn't be appreciated! I was just worried, about all of it. I guess I still am, but maybe there comes a time where we weigh the passion against the doubt? Thanks for sharing, Tara Rose. (I don't know how to do the fancy @user thing!)
 
Oh, yes, it starts its life as a vision, it haunts your dreams but on the page it's nowt but a pile of utter shshshshshs...and it seems set to stay that way for ETERNITY. Or at least another whole year of your short little span. But the magic of alchemy may render it fertilizer. Plod, plod, plod, slip back down the muddy hill, claw back up till there comes a tipping point where you think, you believe and hope you are not now merely delusional...you've GOT it. YES! For better or worse, whatever it is, it's born and can now, if it is actually published, be slaughtered by a troll reviewer. Which is to admit it to the glorious pantheon.
 
I can totally relate to the piece. Some times when I try to write, at the back of my mind is the 'you should get a real job' angst. Whenever I sit to write, every so often, I find myself mentally slapping my face 'what are you doing ???? no one will ever be interested, you are wasting your time. Only your children and your wife, through some warped sense of loyalty will ever, ever be interested. All of your family will laugh at you (As they always have done) you will never be able to work professionally again, its a waste of time'

If I do feel low, it's not a cookie, no no, its the whole sodding packet of McVities Ginger Nuts, all in one go.

But.......there are the mornings, like this morning, were I get up and say 'I'm going to give at least one good hour to this, and I'm going to finish the dialogue between Don El Gordo and Rodrigo, yes sir.'
 
I can totally relate to the piece. Some times when I try to write, at the back of my mind is the 'you should get a real job' angst. Whenever I sit to write, every so often, I find myself mentally slapping my face 'what are you doing ???? no one will ever be interested, you are wasting your time. Only your children and your wife, through some warped sense of loyalty will ever, ever be interested. All of your family will laugh at you (As they always have done) you will never be able to work professionally again, its a waste of time'

If I do feel low, it's not a cookie, no no, its the whole sodding packet of McVities Ginger Nuts, all in one go.

But.......there are the mornings, like this morning, were I get up and say 'I'm going to give at least one good hour to this, and I'm going to finish the dialogue between Don El Gordo and Rodrigo, yes sir.'

At least you have your immediate family, mine just humour me. Barely that even.

I do have many moments of doubt but I think they are justified especially when i realise that this doubt leads on to finding a solution that makes the WIP/MS more exciting. It's a process that hopefully leads to a quality product that we can be proud of...hopefully! :D
 
At least you have your immediate family, mine just humour me. Barely that even.

I do have many moments of doubt but I think they are justified especially when i realise that this doubt leads on to finding a solution that makes the WIP/MS more exciting. It's a process that hopefully leads to a quality product that we can be proud of...hopefully! :D

Yes, I agree. I have not written anything substantive for 6 days (travelling, other things). But I could have, I just doubted that a bit of dialogue was correct for the story / pace. I was probably sub-conciously trying to sort it out in the back ground while I did other stuff. I would not say it was blocking, I just had to go away and do something else before it could sort itself out, and voi la, I have the solution.
 
I can totally relate to the piece. Some times when I try to write, at the back of my mind is the 'you should get a real job' angst. Whenever I sit to write, every so often, I find myself mentally slapping my face 'what are you doing ???? no one will ever be interested, you are wasting your time. Only your children and your wife, through some warped sense of loyalty will ever, ever be interested. All of your family will laugh at you (As they always have done) you will never be able to work professionally again, its a waste of time'

If I do feel low, it's not a cookie, no no, its the whole sodding packet of McVities Ginger Nuts, all in one go.

But.......there are the mornings, like this morning, were I get up and say 'I'm going to give at least one good hour to this, and I'm going to finish the dialogue between Don El Gordo and Rodrigo, yes sir.'

Armageddon! There are no Ginger Nuts (of the McV's brand) to be had. So thou shalt hitch up thy britches, girdle thy loins, tighten thy belt, strangle thy cat, and stroll forth head held high to a braver dawn.

So sayeth the bis-quit god
 
All of my doubt hits when I start editing. Sure, there are twinges here and there during the work, but I typically just take a break until I feel up to writing again. Editing, though...that's where all the good stuff hits. Reading back through something complete can be completely demoralizing when all that goes through your head is: "I can't believe I wrote this sh*t...who would want this drivel printed on actual paper?"

Of course, the MS eventually gets better, but it doesn't keep me from feeling like I'll never get there.

And all this is before sending out query letters to agents...that's a whole other sea of doubt that writers often drown in...
 
All of my doubt hits when I start editing. Sure, there are twinges here and there during the work, but I typically just take a break until I feel up to writing again. Editing, though...that's where all the good stuff hits. Reading back through something complete can be completely demoralizing when all that goes through your head is: "I can't believe I wrote this sh*t...who would want this drivel printed on actual paper?"

Of course, the MS eventually gets better, but it doesn't keep me from feeling like I'll never get there.

And all this is before sending out query letters to agents...that's a whole other sea of doubt that writers often drown in...

Are we not the Masters and Mistresses of Masochism? Or perhaps we should celebrate that we are the Heroes of Hope?
 
Armageddon! There are no Ginger Nuts (of the McV's brand) to be had. So thou shalt hitch up thy britches, girdle thy loins, tighten thy belt, *strangle thy cat*, and stroll forth head held high to a braver dawn. So sayeth the bis-quit god

I don't suppose I could interest you in doing some 'contract work' on my neighbour's moggy...? It doesn't actually 'kill' the wild birds in my garden (it's probably too slow and lazy for that) but it cr*ps in their bird-bath... Talk about chemical-warfare! :)
 
c: 66%, for sure. I can percolate along immersed in a glowing draft, my fingers spinning out of control with a caprophage's grin on my face; then suddenly, I get a feeling I need a bit of time away from it. Maybe some time outside to remember what trees smell like, or a walk on a beach, or any number of other connections with reality. Then a couple of days or months later, when I return to the work, it has become insufferable dreck, or I no longer give a shite for my characters, or... there really is no end to the internal excuses I can summon. In fact, last week, I began a new book with my W.I.P. hovering at 66%. I'd been working on it for three years including quite a bit of travel for research (or so I told myself...). Oh well. Maybe when the new one goes to shite I'll return to the old one?
 
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