Poetry The Menagerie

I was having a drink with my other half in one of our favourite pub gardens the other day and we ended up discussing all the different collective nouns for different animals. We decided it would make an excellent pub quiz round but it struck me it would also make an entertaining piece of verse. So, here it is:


I'm sure we've all seen a Gaggle of geese,

Watched a Scurry of squirrels.

But have you ever found a Flamboyance of flamingos

Or observed an Ostentation of peacocks?

Would you debate with a Parliament of owls,

Or confer with a Consortium of octopus?

We might swim with a Pod of dolphins

And, with them, witness a Galaxy of starfish.

You couldn't fail to notice a Pandemonium of parrots

Or overhear a Clattering of jackdaws.

You might joke with a Cackle of hyenas,

Stretch your legs with a Waddle of penguins.

But I'd steer clear of that Crash of rhinoceros

Also the Quiver of cobras, readied like deadly hooded arrows.

And definitely avoid a Murder of crows.

Those birds are smart, they'll make it look like an accident.