Welcome… I’m New Here! Hi from Florida

[Jason L.]

Hi, I'm Jason. Like most writers, I always think that my own life is far less interesting than the people I write about, but here goes: I am in Florida for now. I have lived in five countries and five states, and I speak five languages (that's actually completely a coincidence, it wasn't like I set out my life saying FIVE, PEOPLE. THE MAGIC NUMBER IS FIVE, and it's not like if I move to Tennessee I'll be like, JESUS CHRIST I HAVE TO LEARN SWEDISH NOW BECAUSE THE FIVE ISN'T A THING ANYMORE). Gay, happily married, fairly quiet life.

And now, because I am already bored with myself, I will pretend that I am in an interview.

So, what do you write about?
I write a lot of things. Most of my stuff has gay (male) characters in it, but I find that I am not really interested in them finding love. In some cases they probably could have been straight characters, but I am too lazy to change them.

Just starting out?
I have written seven novels fully and they all wind up going into whatever the digital version of a sock drawer is. The first couple of books were terrible. The last few were pretty good, so I guess I'm getting there. I still don't publish because I don't know how to market, and also I have stuff to do for my actual career as a history professor.

Tell me some things you love to read?
Stuff that really draws me in and keeps me there (I'm kind of open there. I've read fantasy, mysteries, historicals, high literature, low-brow, YA, and I am pretty eclectic. I can never decide what my favorite books are. It's best to say that certain genres are not a good fit for me: serial-killer police procedurals, horror, and sci-fi don't resonate well with me, and I don't get too much enjoyment out of them.

What are your pet peeves?
Sure, I have them, but I'd rather be positive. Sometimes, I am just not the right audience for this message. Sometimes the message is right but the delivery is not something that I would chosen. Sure, some tropes, plot devices, and stylistic details have made me cringe, but so what? Somebody has read my writing, cringed, and said, "Oh, honey, no." And probably I have hit their pet peeves and triggers.

What about food?
I...I eat it. I mean, it's not like I am walking around saying fresh brains. But I kind of outgrew my gourmand phase.

Working on something now?
Yikes. Sure. Three things at the moment. I went through an extended dry patch of years in which I thought I would never write again, and now all of a sudden words are just coming out again, faster than I can get them down. Almost all of them have some sort of mystery in them.

Plotter or Pantser?
It really depends on the story I am trying to tell. Something that's very character-driven normally cannot have me saying "It's scene four and by God we need some blood now." For those, I have to have a much more loose set of signposts, and I really only plot in detail a few chapters in advance of where I am right now. A more plot-based novel needs some serious time in advance to consider characters, motives, subplots, and where to bury hints and clues.

Give me one deeply unpopular opinion and one that you think that should resonate with people.
I think that chocolate chip cookies are gross. They are too salty and loaded with preservatives. And yes, I have made them homemade and I just don't get it.
I think that beets were just never intended for human consumption. Just because you can technically eat them doesn't mean you should. You can technically eat dandelions and most people aren't loading up on those bad boys either.

Thank you, James! We look forward to hearing more from you.

It's Jas-

And that's our show! Tune in next week, when we interview that guy who thinks Doctor Zhivago should never have been made into a movie!

(Sigh)

 

[izi 出久]

I think that beets were just never intended for human consumption. Just because you can technically eat them doesn't mean you should. You can technically eat dandelions and most people aren't loading up on those bad boys either.

Ok but I love both and BEETS TURN YOUR PEE RED. A perfectly normal reason to want to eat them.

Oh, and hello there, stranger.

 

[Peyton Stafford]

@Jason L. sounds like you already have an interesting life. You don't happen to specialize in the history of the occult, or maybe you do undercover work for a secretive organization that needs a gay Ph.D. with five languages and spy skills? Looking forward to reading your work. I suspect it's very publishable. My academic background is in History of Religions, so I suspect we will be simpatico.

@StaceyDale Yes, there's nothing like a salad of spring dandelion greens with chopped beets on top, with a little balsamic vinegar and olive oil. And if you've ever tried to get a vegetable-averse six-year-old to eat anything not meat, cheese, or sugar, then candied beets and the promise of red pee make a lure the little dears cannot resist. Eating them for Halloween to prank your lover is also great. "I'm dying! My urine has turned to blood!" (Depending on how gross you want to make it, show some red-stained toilet paper or an undergarment. Collapse onto the floor. Engage in vigorous sex when he/she attempts to hug you.) I think I just gave away a great short story idea, or maybe the start of another wacky humor novel.

 

[izi 出久]

And if you've ever tried to get a vegetable-averse six-year-old to eat anything not meat, cheese, or sugar, then candied beets and the promise of red pee make a lure the little dears cannot resist.

My daughter hates beets, but she adores brussels sprouts, broccoli, asparagus, mushrooms, turnips... almost all vegetables except lettuce (all kinds, don't know why) and beets.

 

[RK Wallis]

Just because you can technically eat them doesn't mean you should. You can technically eat dandelions and most people aren't loading up on those bad boys either.

That's too funny, you should try writing humour too Welcome aboard, hope you enjoy it around here!

 

[Jonny]

Hi @Jason L.

Nice to see you and hope you enjoy what Litopia has to offer.

It’s extremely friendly round here so do feel free to get involved as soon as you’re ready.

Here's a good place to check out (How-to guide)to see a lot of what goes on in the colony.

If anything is unclear please contact me and I’ll be happy to assist if I can.

 

[Vagabond Heart]

Hi Jason, welcome to the group. We need another over-sharer so you’re gonna fit like a handmade glove. Delighted to meet you.

 

[Jason L.]

@Jason L. sounds like you already have an interesting life. You don't happen to specialize in the history of the occult, or maybe you do undercover work for a secretive organization that needs a gay Ph.D. with five languages and spy skills? Looking forward to reading your work. I suspect it's very publishable. My academic background is in History of Religions, so I suspect we will be simpatico.

My academic background is in the eighteenth century Atlantic: I was a colonial/revolutionary Latin Americanist for my master's work and colonial/revolutionary North Americanist/pre-confederation Canadianist for doctoral work, so I am sort of weirdly qualified to know about an entire hemisphere. I did some reading on the occult when I was a teenager, but not too much.

Unfortunately, I have neither a superabundance of diplomacy nor the patience for espionage. I cannot imagine how awful I would be in either capacity.

Absolutely no idea if I am publishable. As I said, once written and sampled by about a dozen people, I basically retire my stuff. In some cases, it's because I realize that I desperately need to write a sequel that isn't coming to me yet. In some cases, it's because I'm busy and other ideas just came to me first. I am telling myself that I am building up a backlist of acceptable works so that I can promote the lot at one moment. But I like the journey, and that's what matters.

Thank you for your warm welcome, Peyton!

 

[Jason L.]

Hi Jason, welcome to the group. We need another over-sharer so you’re gonna fit like a handmade glove. Delighted to meet you.

Oh, dear! I hope that I do not become obnoxious. There are always people who seem to dominate the conversation and never let other people talk. I would not like to be that person.

 

[Jason L.]

That's too funny, you should try writing humour too Welcome aboard, hope you enjoy it around here!

Thank you! I try to make at least one character funny in each story, but it's tiring. I tried to carry through my first few novels on ebullient surface charm, and that is why they are never seeing the light of day again. Having learned my lesson, I am now a little more cautious and reflective. Thank you for the welcome!

 

[Vagabond Heart]

Oh, dear! I hope that I do not become obnoxious. There are always people who seem to dominate the conversation and never let other people talk. I would not like to be that person.

Ah, sorry, forgot you don’t know my twisted humour yet. You seem the least obnoxious person on here, and your writing is also wryly good, even in your intro. Was just replying, tongue in cheek. You are truly welcome.

 

[MattScho]

Hi, I'm Jason. Like most writers, I always think that my own life is far less interesting than the people I write about, but here goes: I am in Florida for now. I have lived in five countries and five states, and I speak five languages (that's actually completely a coincidence, it wasn't like I set out my life saying FIVE, PEOPLE. THE MAGIC NUMBER IS FIVE, and it's not like if I move to Tennessee I'll be like, JESUS CHRIST I HAVE TO LEARN SWEDISH NOW BECAUSE THE FIVE ISN'T A THING ANYMORE). Gay, happily married, fairly quiet life.

And now, because I am already bored with myself, I will pretend that I am in an interview.

So, what do you write about?
I write a lot of things. Most of my stuff has gay (male) characters in it, but I find that I am not really interested in them finding love. In some cases they probably could have been straight characters, but I am too lazy to change them.

Just starting out?
I have written seven novels fully and they all wind up going into whatever the digital version of a sock drawer is. The first couple of books were terrible. The last few were pretty good, so I guess I'm getting there. I still don't publish because I don't know how to market, and also I have stuff to do for my actual career as a history professor.

Tell me some things you love to read?
Stuff that really draws me in and keeps me there (I'm kind of open there. I've read fantasy, mysteries, historicals, high literature, low-brow, YA, and I am pretty eclectic. I can never decide what my favorite books are. It's best to say that certain genres are not a good fit for me: serial-killer police procedurals, horror, and sci-fi don't resonate well with me, and I don't get too much enjoyment out of them.

What are your pet peeves?
Sure, I have them, but I'd rather be positive. Sometimes, I am just not the right audience for this message. Sometimes the message is right but the delivery is not something that I would chosen. Sure, some tropes, plot devices, and stylistic details have made me cringe, but so what? Somebody has read my writing, cringed, and said, "Oh, honey, no." And probably I have hit their pet peeves and triggers.

What about food?
I...I eat it. I mean, it's not like I am walking around saying fresh brains. But I kind of outgrew my gourmand phase.

Working on something now?
Yikes. Sure. Three things at the moment. I went through an extended dry patch of years in which I thought I would never write again, and now all of a sudden words are just coming out again, faster than I can get them down. Almost all of them have some sort of mystery in them.

Plotter or Pantser?
It really depends on the story I am trying to tell. Something that's very character-driven normally cannot have me saying "It's scene four and by God we need some blood now." For those, I have to have a much more loose set of signposts, and I really only plot in detail a few chapters in advance of where I am right now. A more plot-based novel needs some serious time in advance to consider characters, motives, subplots, and where to bury hints and clues.

Give me one deeply unpopular opinion and one that you think that should resonate with people.
I think that chocolate chip cookies are gross. They are too salty and loaded with preservatives. And yes, I have made them homemade and I just don't get it.
I think that beets were just never intended for human consumption. Just because you can technically eat them doesn't mean you should. You can technically eat dandelions and most people aren't loading up on those bad boys either.

Thank you, James! We look forward to hearing more from you.

It's Jas-

And that's our show! Tune in next week, when we interview that guy who thinks Doctor Zhivago should never have been made into a movie!

(Sigh)

Your interviewer seemed like a a bit of an ass. you should have stormed out.
Welcome. Hope you enjoy.
BTW, Chocolate chip cookies are too salty? I haven't had one, or seen one, in years, but I had no idea they were heavily salted.

 

[gbhunt]

Hi @Jason L. Pleased to meet you!